The message is now even clearer... Oh God, Thy will be done. If this is Your will, I'll give everything. AAARGH!!! Dunno alredy... Just cant write more.
1. God's provision is on time, never be too early, never be too late.
2. I am not ready for marriage.
3. Meaning romance is too early.
4. Meaning I'll have to wait.
5. Advance proposal is not viable coz it shows possessiveness.
Ha?! You think in Singapore nothing is free eh? Hahaha... Not true. There are few free stuff in Singapore. Note: some required thick-skinness to get. Dont tell me I havent warn you hahaha. But then again, for some people who have very little amount of money, this might be useful. Here's the list:
1. Free iced plain water
- Any fast food chain (McD, KFC, BK)
- Standard Chartered (I only know the one in Shaw House, though)
- Get the ice cubes from 711's Gulp machines and go to the nearest toilet
- NUH Emergency waiting room
2. Free Internet (legal one, that is)
- Any Topshops (the one I have tested is in Wisma Atria)
- The trial I'm using right now, available at MRT stations: Yishun, AMK, Orchard, City Hall, Raffles Place, Bugis
- Changi Airport, if you have a boarding pass
3. Free food
- Bee Cheng Hiang samples
- ISETAN Supermarket in B1 of Shaw House sometimes holds food fair (meaning free samples)
4. Free local phone calls
- Hall 4 ACS(I) Boarding School (pity the access is very limited)
- Changi Airport (people use them a lot)
5. Free foot massage
- Changi Airport (again) arrival terminal
6. Free coins
- Need some luck, search through all vending machines you can find
7. Free living appliances
- NUS and NTU Halls of Residence, at the end of a academic year (trust me, it's like IKEA having 100% discount promotion)
50 bucks is the price for my close-to-nonsensical worry @ Nong Khai. That's some wasting of my money but hope the cause worth it. I dunno... I HOPE it does worth it. Late development does not support my original theory. Who knows? I mean it's just funny of me feeling 'jealous' when I do not have the right to. Well, I've read the Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris and I know that stupid feeling is wrong. I cant lay claim of anyone or any actions that do not belong to me correct? Oh well, not saying that jealousy is wrong. I mean God calls Himself 'jealous'. As I said, it just depends on the nature of ownership of the things being 'jealoused' at. Okay, this paragraph is close to nonsense coz I deliberately omitted some details. Never mind about this, I just feel like writing this stuff down... No other intention.
Anyways, being an 'I/S/D' person, I just cant help to calculate risk and analyze problems. Good thing that some times God gives me some kinds of sharpness to cut through the superficial layer of conversation. Like yesterday, was in the middle of chat with (hmm... let's give her a nickname...) 'little cow' and out of the blue I asked her whether she got a story to tell... This light conversation ended up as serious one (about BGR) and I'm glad that I could help someone in a sense. Took a compliment from her "i mean, lmy jg buat curhat langsugn mengena gitu ehehehe" (translation: "i mean not bad for sharing, you are very direct"). Oh well, thanks for that. This reminds me of previous incident with my good friend, SiDney. Shall not disclose anything here coz I'll remember this incident for life. Do I have that instinct? I'm not sure coz the thing kicked a few times in my life. If I were to master that instinct to cut through the surface, who knows... I might end up as a councillor / psychologist or whatever you call it.
Read a very interesting blog today, one of a famous fella in NUS. I salute him for his freaking creativity on reporting political matters in NUS. Hahaha... 5 thumbs up: my thumbs, my toes, and my thumbdrive... (oh hey, that's an original, yay!) In the blog, he refers to many incidents in NUS by creating a parallel world. What is it called again? Social satire or something. Well, it is just plain cool, hahaha....
Unlike someone (or many ones) out there, I am not waiting till last minutes to decide what module I should take next sem. Other than 4 core modules, I am planning to go for Chinese 1 and one of the TR modules. I think my taking TR module can be easily understood coz I'm planning to minor there. But why Chinese??? Some people told me that it is a very difficult-to-score module. Well, I dont believe so. Bul got A and Jahat got B+. My main reason to take Chinese 1 is so that I understand my race's language and hopefully culture as well. After all I might need to do something in the future in Chinese (details undisclosed yet...)
Chinese is tough! I got the impression today. Let the story begins. Well one fine day at Plaza Singapura's Carl's Jr... Hmm, maybe I should refer to one of my older posts here. Anyways, on top of the Chilli Cheeseburger with Ivan NB, we were discussing about next sem module. So we are planning to take Chinese 1 next sem. Yeah, that's the spoilsport module. I know many people who know Chinese and still want to take that basic module. Oh, and Nonk also plans to take this module, and his Chinese is pretty good, and he aims to get an A+, and I think I am going to coerce him to do my work haha... Latest info from Jahat is that the tutors can kick people out from Chinese 1 class if they found out that a student has some mastery in Chinese. Wew... Well, I dont have any... So yeah, cant kick me haha...
Oh and talking about Nonk, I think we are going to share the above mentioned modules haha... I'm Engin and he is SDE but it's just a coincidence that we shared 2 modules. And from previous experiences in TR2201, sharing module with Nonk might mean sleepless nights coz we are both last minuters. Not that we dont want to do it on time, just that ideas flow freely when we got no time. But then again, I'm hoping to get other A's like my TR.
Talked briefly to my dad about my result. He's not that satisfied but he said it was okay. His target for me for next sem: SAP 3.50. I think it is manageable coz I've found my motivation already. Moreover, I'm going to drop some CCAs and that means more spendable time. Hopefully can rake up some good marks from Chinese and TR. But the challenge is that I'm taking 6 modules without S/U option. Meaning more stuff to learn. Consistency then is a must. I shall pray so that I can stay focus in my studies. For a slacker like me, it is going to be tough, but I shall try.
Oh another challenge... How to manage my social life. I dont want to score 5.0 but lose many friends in the process. I mean being a hypersocial person, I might go crazy if I dont see anyone around me. If I were to lose my friends I dunno how long I can stay sane. Oh well, I'm not that sane after all. Anyways, time management is going to be very very important... This might be a test for my maturity. Might not there yet, but trying and trying and trying.
Keeping tabs, those confirmed coming to NUS: Kris, Doni, Anita, Harry
Whoo boy... I was too busy these days till I forgot that my exam result is coming out 26th May 1700. Okay, here is my result:
CS1101C B
great... considering I went laptopless last semester
EG1108 C
what??? that low? is it coz i screwed up the midterm?
MA1505 B-
thanks a lot yeah... seriously thanks for 'making' me come to lectures haha
PC1432 C+
ok... this is caused by my own mistake neglecting assignments: labs, mastering physics...
TR2201 A-
whoo yeah!!! wooohoooo!!! PTL!!! yay!!!
Am I happy? Yeah. Marks are improving compared to last semester. And my CAP increased a little. Nice one actually, 0.04 short to 3. Despite the improvements, I fell short of my dad's SAP target of 3.50 (and my own freak aim of 3.8). Oh by the way, must thank God for my first 'A' wheeee!!! Although it is an A- and it is not core (should I change major to business? haha) yeah, I am really thankful for that. Credit goes to Mr. Andrew Ng the awesome lecturer, n my group members (Nonk, Asoh, ZY, SL, Cindy, Yunle). Another one to thank, haha... You know who (not Voldemort, duh!) you are haha. The one girl who motivated me through last semester (not all the semester though). If and only if I have known her much earlier, haha, who knows I might have broken the 3.00 already by now. Anyways, yeah. Thanks a lot. I mean it. For everything.
Past few days been normal for me but abnormal for my friends....
- My girl friend's blood pressure dropped to a dangerous level. I pray VERY VERY hard about her. I do not want to lose her now.
- My FA mate is having a high fever.
- Another FA mate is going to be unable to go to church soon. Objection from family.
- My 'tuition' student faced the music from her mum and her granny and her landlord.
Sometimes make me wonder... Why does all the good people suffer? I remember one of the guys in the Bible complained about this as well but dont remember who. Oh well, that is life. It never been fair. People studied like hell and still fell short to those who never studied in his entire life. Nice guys lost to bad boys upon relationship matters, etc etc. Well, I did complain about that. But actually I am not in the place of that. I mean I'm just a small fry (no, a minuscule virus) in this huge world. Upon this realization the only thought which comes into my mind was God. This is how I define my God:
My God is big, so strong, so mighty
My God's plan for me, goes beyond my wildest dreams
My God is good, He's so good to me
He's my God and He is my refuge
He's the rock on which I stand
He's my fortress, God He is my life
He holds the oceans in His hand
There is nothing my God cannot do
There are 4 types of love as far as I understand: agape, philia, storge and eros. Okay, maybe a little confusing here, so here is the link to Wikipedia to describe all the 4 terms. And all these required well-oiled communication to work. Okay, one might argue about agape. Well, it may be true. Agape is the ultimate love. So yeah, lets take agape out. However, as I feel it today, sometimes, the main difference between true love and fleeting love is how it responds to the cease of communication.
Today is exceptionally interesting. Other than Nonk shaving his hair bald, I met two of my old friends. One is DC (Daniel Chan), my sec 4 classmate, and somehow we still remember each other, even through one glimpse, a typical passing each other thingy. The other one is Tim Lim (Mr. Timothy Lim), the Thio Chan Bee hallmaster. Now for the train of thought... Some days, friends will part their ways. But come think about it, friendships last. Does it? I think so. At least true ones will last for a long period, even there is a certain period of lapse in communication. Among true friends, there would be a certain bond of love which can compensate for lack of communication. It transcends distance and time. (whoa!)
And talking about a cease in communication, that reminds me of the saying 'true love waits'. Well, that is indeed the case in my honest opinion. One of the ways to differentiate between lust, just-an-infatuation and love is that only love will not pass the time test. Lust will be gone in a glimpse of an eye (best way to eliminate: prayer). Infatuation will cease once there is no communication (trust me, I have been there). But true love, by God's grace, will stand forever. Believeng in this, I always put my electric-sense-upon-seeing-that-girl into the 'time' test. And it is one of the toughest test around, coz you would have many weird thought when you are not seeing him/her for many days. And these days I am in this period. And I am 'tortured' in some sense. But I'm hanging right here, coz I want the best of me for this girl. The last thing I would want as a reason to break up with a girl is 'ilfil' (lost of feeling). So yeah, God please give me strength.
And now back to friendship. Among true friends there would be philos and from my definition of, it would last forever. So I do belive that my friends, no matter who where and how they are, will remain as my friends. Okay, this post may be a little incoherent and undeveloped, partially due to my tiredness, will try to go back to this post later (maybe). But yeah, that's my thought today before I completely forget about it.
PS: This post has been editted on 26th May.
