A thing about family

Yesterday I was back to my usual business after the tough PC exam... Well at least that's the least right... I'm glad that EXAM IS OVER. Sorry, that is quite sensitive to some fellows out there. So yeah, I have resumed my works and this means another tiring day yesterday. Whee...

Meet the trio again today and it appears that the eldest sister, Jess, still could not reconcile with her mum... Sad. Now that I think of my relationship with my family I am very very thankful. My dad is a hardworker with a high level of pride. I shared with someone that my dad and I had some 'contest' on which he challenged me of getting 3.5 and I challenged him to be manager. Well, I think we both managed to get it (or at least I think). My mom is a caring but fierce at times. Typical mum, eh? Maybe... She can cook uber well though. Always miss her corn soup and tomato sambal. My bro, ahahahahhaha, another crazy lame guy whose mind can synchronize very very well with me. We always thought along the same way (our dressing senses are different though) especially when we jack someone. My family is always (or most of the time) at peaceful stance, which is a good thing... I am really thankful to Da Big Man for giving me this family.

Moving on the lighter side... Waaa... People still thought I am still hurt over Grace thing. And no! Okay, she was my crush but I have gotten over it two months ago (that is before I meet this someone) so yeah, no hurt feeling at all. In fact I am laughing coz two of my friends are attached now. Well, still havent congatz them. One day if I meet them again. Talked to Tony over the phone about this. Whee... He's coming over to NUS (hopefully) next year as Archi undergrad. Hope he can make it coz I think he got a good chance considering his current internship in an archi company. Also received an SMS from Kris saying "... gotta move on ..." and yeah dude... I've moved on, haha, pray for me okay. Basically my plan has finalized, just hoping in these few days, I can get good hints from her. Praying hard...

Sigh, will be leaving for Thailand in a week time. That means I'm not going to see her in 3 months. Wew... That sucked coz the effect of my effort this sem may go to drain. Some more I'm really afraid that someone there in 3 months can deal enough damage to me. She is like umm you know... an attractive girl, sure someone is going to hook up on her. I'm especially worried about X. He's the ex-boyfriend for 4 years and they are in good terms. Oh, no... Dilemma... If I'm not doing it now, gonna waste a lot. I'm not sure about my chance... I'm still praying for this though. I'm seriously in need of divine revelation. What does this thing gotta do with family anyway? I never intend to get a girlfriend juz for fun. I am always serious if I'm after someone. So yeah... In the meantime I'll just gonna expect something huge from God during the Thailand mission trip. May not be about 'PH', but I have the faith.

Wild Wild West

The auntie in the Techno Edge Western Food stall is CRAZZZEEE. I was going to the Comp Cent today to do the freaky Mastering Physics... Ei, I'm in Engin does not mean that I am strong in Physics. Heck if I know about the Schrodinger equation... Hey, Mr. Schrod, why do you make my life difficult huh? Anyways, I went there with that girl (coz she said she needed a computer to study her Bio) and we took a break by having lunch/dinner. Well... I had only one food in mind and thus, I appeared in front of that auntie (my fren one haha). Wanted to ask where the uncle is but dont feel like doing such.

Anyways, I wasnt prepared for her 'attack'. She asked me right in front of that girl whether she is my girlfriend. Damn it! I WASNT PREPARED, and thus making one mistake I considered as a stupid one. I replied her "No laaa... Not yet!" (oops!) and this is what made me sooo paiseh: she asked me "Is she a girl? Is she your friend?"... Damn! She got me this time... What made me feel disheartened today is that the girl reaction did not show anything (worst case la).

I made that same girl feel bad. Wew... She fell asleep when we were using the computers at the Comp Cent. Feeling bad making her bored, I asked her to go home so that she could sleep at the comfort of her own room. She apologized many times to me the whole trip. I was simply confused... I mean she did not do any wrongs to me yet she apologized to me like that. What should I do? I think many guys have undergone this situation. Not knowing what to do, I asked her what she wanted me to do so that she does not feel bad anymore. Anyways, I promised her that I will work hard tonite so I can score for my Physics (my weakest subject)... Wew, dont feel like studying already. I'm so tired of studying today... And as Why put it, the twin demon of procrastination and distraction are attacking me... Oh no... Somebody please save me.....

These two experiences today make me think how the two gender groups think differently. Indeed it sometimes causes problems in relationships but that makes the world interesting, eh? Okay, my post sucked! But that is because of that Wild Wild West incident... And I'm a little bit feeling insecure today... Wew....

8 hours...

Yesterday I went missing for 8 solid hours from the Project Room 6B community. I ostracized myself to TV Room of R4. Why the hell an R6 fella there? Because of you said Edwin, but no way... I'm there because of her hahaha (see my previous post point 18). Interestingly, out of the 8 hours I think I spent half of it chatting and half of it studying. Well, interesting in a way that I never experienced such things with on my previous attempts.

Anyways, I am intrigued by what she mentioned today. She told me (referring to the chicken rice incident) that a husband should protect the wife. It is indeed true. Nonetheless, I would like to extend to the point that every single guys has the responsibility to protect every girls. I dunno whether this philosophy of mine holds true in all case. I believe that while females are the 'weaker' sex, it does not mean that they can be bullied, harmed, injured, be it physically or emotionally by the males as the 'stronger' sex. After all, isnt it true that males need females too? Even God created Eve to be 'helper' of Adam. Okay, the term I used here might not really express what I want to say. Maybe "penolong yang sepadan" is the better phrase.

Talked quite a lot in the power of prayer. Well she said that her prayer once chased monkeys away from a zoo. Well, that's crazy enough. Hopefully not trying to do that to me... Anyway, I dont quite understand what she undergoes (underwent) but I can sense that something is wrong with the relationship between her parents, shall pray for that as well. Haha, I myself has witnessed the craziest power of prayer. Maybe next time I shall share my stupidest answered prayer. Can I set a remaider on blogspot?? Talking about the word 'pray', that reminds me of the first time I decided to go after this girl. Her MSN nick was 'pray pray pray'. Oh well... Being a filial son to my parents, I follow my Dad's instruction on getting a Christian wife/girlfriend/crush. Hence, when I want to chase after someone I would DEFINITELY clarify (no pun intended) whether she is a Christian. I asked her (with a little bit of cocky tone) whether she believed in the power of prayer. I was really glad to read the answer "I'm a Christian" (gotcha!)... Anyways, I believe that "Doa orang benar, bila dengan yakin didoakan, sangat besar kuasanya" (James 5:16b "The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective"). This was what I emphasized to her just now.

Well, I would have to sleep soon... Coz in 3 hours I would have to search a room to study. I'll have to make sure she does not give up on one of her subjects while I need her to motivate me. I see her already enough to inspire me one haha... Physics Physics Physics.... Yes, I have just realized that I might have been dependent or her. For God's sake I'm single! I could not be that dependent. Moreover I'm a man!!! Oh God, please stop me from going too far...

Oh, I should welcome Mr. biby cletus, the first ever stranger-visitor to this blog. Welcome, welcome... Enjoy your stay. How do you come across this supposedly private blog? Anyway, once again welcome.

Make a day of a day

1. You are still reeling from the yesterday happiness (see my last post)
2. You remember that you jacked someone (Citra) and she does the right thing haha...
3. You sleep well that day (thanks to Nonk who let me sleep so long)
4. You take a nap after the long sleep
5. You know that you are having a relatively easy exam
6. You do the exam mentioned in no 4 and it is fun
7. You are not having exam tomorrow
8. You receive a message saying "...hope this make your day :)..." before the exam
9. You realize that you break your record on pages written in two hours
10. You eat great food with great company (not Microsoft though)
11. You dont have to work today
12. You receive a great help from your friend (thanks again, Yong)
13. You like the weather
14. You get the chance to use an expensive laptop
15. You get the idea on how to propose to a girl
16. You know that the idea can work
17. You know that the idea can be implemented some other ways
18. You go and meet that girl today

Out of those, only the 18th point havent been done today. Hahahahaha... But yeah, these fortify my stand before that if we stop and be thankful for all that is happening in our life, this life is going to be lively. Long live lively life!!!

Amazing Grace

THANK YOU LORD!!!! THANKS!!! THANKS!!!

Okay, this log is posted only few minutes after I posted me last one. I AM REALLY REALLY HAPPY TODAY!!! Why? Coz Grace is now attached. Who is Grace? My crush. Why happy then? Coz God miraculously (I actually questioned myself how n why) lifted up my any feelings towards her few month before now. I mean one day I just woke up and say to myself "OK! IT IS ENOUGH!". How crazy was that considering my 2 years of 'investment'? (sorry, dunno the better word for that). That is before He intro me to this wonderful girl haha. Oh well, THANKS A LOT for giving me this extra shield!

Actually this is the second time He does this to me. The first time was 5 years ago. He kicked me all the way to Singapore to avoid a girl (PS: now she somehow is going to marry in a few months time, oh and yes, she is 18). But in this case I'm the most grateful of His grace coz I think if I havent been saying "OK! IT IS ENOUGH!" I am gonna jump down of PGP's 13th floor (if there is any). Okay, maybe te story is really unclear. It is really a bit unclear coz the full story is of about 3 years span long... But for now...

THANKS YOU LORD!!!! THANKS!!! THANKS!!!
YOU ARE THE MAN (AND THE LORD)!!!

The Gay Day (gay = happy)

Ok... Need to explain some stuff I wrote in the previous post. I said "Money can really buy stuff, hahaha...." No, I dont believe money can buy everything. I merely said that sometimes money is required to achieve 'success' (jer basuki mawa beya)

Whee... So far it is a happy day. Oh happy day.... Oh happy day.... Hahahhaa. No exam! Good good. I slept quite a lot 2am-11am then lunch then sleep till 4pm hahaha. Such a long sleep never been experienced in the past months (okay, I might have exaggerated something here). I realized that I am considered as the guy with little sleep as Jahat n Asec commented right in front of me yesterday. I was telling them I was sleepy. Jahat said "Bukan Mike, pasti alien nih!" (This guy is not Mike, it's an alien) referring to my seldom-ness of being sleepy. Then Asec said something of equal content. So yea... Sleep is good!

Another good thing... She recovered pretty well... I am really blessed by what she mentioned in her msg "of course :) spent whole night with God :)" Blessed huh? She is REALLY strong gal one. Seems like everyone is created their own craziness and goodness. Mine might not manifested yet (other than my uber lamistry skill haha) but one day sure appear.

Another one... I got $10 bucks from filling a survey today! Not that I'm glad I got the money. I'm glad that the gang is all (okay, minus Edwin who's dunno doing wad) going together (plus Vinz n Jahat). As a socially social person, I'm just very glad to be in a large group of ppl whom I know very well. Very grateful that I met these bunch of friends in NUS.

Another one... It is raining now! Yay! I like rain! But someone not happy if raining coz her room will be flooded. Let's pray that there will be a miraculous waterproof coating floating outside her room. Umh hey God, please help her would You... Thanks a lot arh... But I'm happy! Rain is good coz ppl would turn of the aircon haha. I cant stand (sit or sleep as well) unnatural coolness. If you put me in a town 18 with air temp of 18^C I cant take it, but if you put me in an aircon room set to 18^C I'll sure freeze one. Whee... So yeah, thank God for the rain (think it's enuf already la by now...).

So yeah... Good day today. I learn that if my mood has been set to 'superb', every little happy things can be noticed sooo easily. In turn, I can see well that today is a real damn good day. Hopefully my mood will remain like this forever and ever (I'm always high, but doesnt mean always happy, correct?), but then again if I know that I've got a Friend in the highest place I would always be happy correct?

"Coz I know my God saves the days
and I know His words never fail
and I know my God made a way for me..."

Cheers (aka back to mug mug mug mug mug-a-mug)

De-struct

I dont like structures. Especially ones which come together with typedef. Today (or rather yesterday, since it past 12pm already) paper was pretty tough. Honestly, who in their right mind would expect half of the paper (or more) consists of structures. Hell! Structures are only discussed in the last 1 hr of lecture... But still gotta thank God, coz Yong and Sec was talking about structures right in front of me before the exam about the structures so yeah, learnt a lot from it. Besides, pretty much lucky coz I remember that there is a 'selection sort' thingy (okay Sec, laugh at me la...) in the textbook and hence I copied from it, hopefully got 5 marks or something. Talking about the textbook, some crazy fella (Jahat, not the Nico, the Erwin) bought $51.50 C for Dummies in order to assist his study. No wonder he improved much from mid term to PE. Cool xia! Money can really buy stuff, hahaha....

A good thing happened today! Andrew Ng, the TR2201 lectures told me that my group has made a lot of improvement in the project and hence rewarding us with extra marks... Good good.... Meaning Nonk's and mine own sacrifice countless nights before are not really going to the drain. Here's the link to the website. Hahahaha.... Nonk the pro designer... Whee.... Lucky got him in the group. Oh, must credit Yong as well coz he lend us his printer to print 44 pages of the marketing report. Wew... That's like 60% of the final grade. Now only left with the 40% of the written exam tomorrow. Gotta sleep soon so that can study today noon...

A not-so-good thing happened as well... Adit was down today coz of CS1101C... He said he screwed up. Oh well, everyone screwed up wad? Even Armeen (dunno how to spell his name haha) said he is going to be very very grateful if he got a D. Colin said that he was going to bid for CS1101C and EG1108 coz he is sure he will fail hahahha. But then again...Adit has recovered. Wheee goood. Met him just now and he looked way much better than how he looked like after the exam yesterday. I'm still waiting for another soul to give me her update though... Her blog shows that she was down as well, regretting that she was not really doing her best. Here's an extract of her blog:

"did i try my best? wat caused all these to happen? my overconfidence regarding my mid term test results? my poor time management? exam panic? was it my fault? i dono...i have no idea...but i know if i were given 2 more hours time for revision just now, i would be able to score well this time...sigh...i'm not sad...just a bit..blur...cuz i want the answer......"

Oh well.... Everything happens for a reason. Like in the Bible, the reason why a blind man is blind is so that God's glory can be manifested in his life. But one thing that I'm sure of. Like ACS motto The Best Is Yet To Be. No matter how well or how badly something is done, it can always be improved. It is up to us to strive to be the best. Even when we are there, there is always something else to be beaten. Life is a constant struggle. Only in God we can get all the answers. Maybe not now though...

CS1101C--

Yesterday's EG is pretty much fun. Haha... Other than throwing away few precious marks, nothing much out of ordinary. Oh wait, I could do more than 1 question out of 5... That's extraordinary. WOOOHHOOOOO!!! I thought I was going to screw up, my MSN personal message was 'white flag' hahaha. Well, I screwed up but not that badly you see, thats some improvements... This time I must thank Yong (aka Scast) for letting me bug his laptop for last 2hrs before exams, haha, that helped me a lot (one of the questions I did was on logic gates, which I learnt only 2 hrs before the exam). It was raining heavily before the start of the exam. I thought it was a bad omen wew. But apparently it's not, coz I could walk all the way from Engin bus stop to MPSH without getting wet... Whee... Apparently I know the routes in NUS already, unlike someone whose compiling time to differentiate left and right is 2 seconds.

Oh no, did I say compiling.... Bah, CS1101C soon, but I gave up stuying. I think I'm going to re-read the structure part later, but that's all. Been studying quite a lot for PE (the failure) and pretty much cant study anything, coz everything is logic. I dunno how to train logic (and I dunno how to ship and plane it as well)... For those who are not lame enough: train, ship, plane... Got it now? Ok, back to CS1101C. My friends say that instead of taking CS1101C, it is more recommended to take CS1101CT or CS1101T. At least can destress when you are dealing with that module (I'm talking about Counter Strike zzz).

Well, I am very very proud to announce that I beat Dudutz 6-4 on a DE match in deathmatch. Haha, I dunno whether he gave chance (ngefur) me or not but yayayayay! I'm so proud coz Dudutz is considered as the best Indonesian CS player here. Oh hell, even the Sri Lankans are pretty much afraid of his equal capability of attacking using the sidearm and the primary weapons. I think I'm going to play a lot after this exam, wheee... And I'll stick to my scavenger policy (aka buying armor, ammo and DE only). Why? THE pride is there hahaha. Imagine playing rush and kill 3 guys using DE (which I did yesterday haha, happily so tyco)

On the heavier note, I realized how much I miss my family at home if I think about it. So far I miss my family but NOT that much, up to a point I want to go home so often. But yesterday I was deep in my thought about my family and yes, I admit I miss them. Indeed it is true that blood is thicker than water. And to extrapolate it, babes are now, but brothers are forever (quote from Khoa). So yeah, no matter how much I seem to be very free, I am still attached to my family, wew....

EG1108++

Am I going to be electrocuted this afternoon? Whee... 7 hrs to exam and I still struggle a lot to do even the simplest electronic problem. And I just cant study, been forcing myself to study for the past 24 hours or so. But ended up asleep in my desk or on my bed or on the chair or wherever. Maybe I need a 'catalyst' to get me to study. I have seen the catalyst few times online but yeah, just dun feel like troubling her, coz I understand that she needs her own time to study. If I ask her to help me (at least be there so I regain my study will) she would need to sac her own time isnt it? Bleh... Just realized I have been dependent on that creature, hahahahaha. No way! Must back to study and match her haha... Regain my pride!

For the past few weeks, I have enjoyed the company of many different fella in my Project Room 6B (which I call 'my temp room'). Some people who I am close to and some others are just my acquaintances... I think exam is one of the most funnest fun time in NUS. All the last minute catch up, all the crazy thing done under stress, all the madness of debate over a cheem question, all the burn-the-midnight-oil session, basicly all the stuff in my temp room has brought me closer to many people. This kind of atmosphere has been existed in my life the past year. I'm glad that in NUS I have met (and cliqued) these wonderful so called good (and crazy) friends. If it were not these guys around I might end up like one guy I know well, hiding in the room with the computer games as company. Maybe next year we will remain like this, or might not be (coz some guys are leaving, but trying to come back to PGP would you?!?!) so yeah... Dank, Dit, Do, Dwin, Nonk, Sec, Ted, thanks a lot!

Aftermath....

Okay... MA1506 was pretty much horrible!!! I mean the exam sucked. Can only complete 8 parts out of 16, one part wrong already. Although it is some kinds of improvement, (last sem MA1505 I attempted 8 out of 16) I know pretty damn well that as long as I do a lot of practice from lecture notes and past year qns, I should have mastered the exam. I mean, the questions are near carbon copy of those have already given to us.

I have swallowed my pride yesterday and I admit that it is my mistake. As someone pointed out to me, yeah think I've set my priority wrongly. I was too much involved in CCA and work (I think...) up to a point I neglected my study. Yeah, make sense (aka she is fully right) coz I spent least amount in studies compared to my other commitments. Pretty paiseh yesterday. I feel that I failed to meet my own expectation. Besides, feel paiseh to her as well. I mean she is like teaching me a lot of stuff but I was demoralized at question two!!! Damn. I was thinking no way a bacteria can grow hundredfold in 4 seconds ++. I got it correct but somehow I feel demoralized. Next questions I just did anyhow as if I dont care already. Well, at least the process of learning worthed. I learn a lot of new stuff in the past 2 weeks especially past two days hahaha. Of course man! Dangyunhaji!

I found a new addiction in terms of Dangyunhaji game (search for it in Youtube). Basicly it is just a question answer game where the two players taking turns to ask the other player a question. The one being asked must answer the question with "Dangyunhaji!" meaning "of course". Played that with Danny and it was quite tough game. He compared me to cow which is only there to be slaughtered while I compared him to a dog that likes a female bitch. My winning question was "Then you are calling Risca a dog??". No offense to both parties but I do understand there are two meanings of that question. Wheee.... Danny played with Vincent later on. I heard Danny beat Vincent by threatening to destroy the latter's Toshiba Tecra.

Currently feeling light-hearted. My FA is doing very well, marked by Yossy's coming today. Heard that she got some kind of problem and stressed up as a result. Been praying for her well-being. I dont want another suicide in my life... But good thing she came today. The members from the FA made a motivated card as initiated by NB. We prayed for Yossy as well and yeah, I do hope she can remain cheerful as today (laughed a lot thanks to the FA's 'garinkness'/lameness ). I also found out that Praisely has a talent of being lame. Hahahhaha. Good, I've got another successor other than Toni in my FA.

MA1506

Tomorrow is the MA 1506 final exam. Am I ready? Not really. But thanks to a particular human being, I'm improving haha. At least my cheat sheet is half done. Today I realized that, I need to do my math question slower instead of faster. I wont be able to finish all questions anyway... Might as well make sure I'll get all answered questions correct. Someone today has forced me to do all the past year exams questions. Oh well... Will do it soon. I am taking a break after the not-so-torturous study hours by playing World Domination thanks to Jahat for intro me to that game (I wont curse him haha, though it has poisoned me)... Status now: Chapter 1-4 check... Will write update if there is any. Wheeeee.... Back to work (or dinner maybe)

A little bit about massaging

I picked up massaging somewhere and somehow. I dunno how I first learn how to massage. As far as the timeline concerned, I've been massaging my dad since I'm like in primary school. When I was a bit older, I read about reflexology and sudddenly learned about it. The knowledge just flowed like that. I havent realized anything funny about this particular skill. I just know that I learn by being massaged, that works like Rogue of X-MEN. I can copy other masseuse skill if it is being done to me...

Fast forward to when I was working in Es Teler 77. The boss (Ci Meity) asked me to do some massage and it turned out that I could 'fix' her problem. Since then the staff asked me to massage them because Ci Meity promoted to everyone that I can massage, hahaha (Makcik sometimes asked to massage her hands and Mba Endang... umh, practically everything, haha). Once I even got the chance to massage Ci Meity's dad, who was a gym-goer, and heck, it was SOOOOOOOO TOUGH. Really felt like I was massaging a steel (wonder if I have to massage Clark Kent, how much energy I have to spend)

Anyways, one of those days, I was having a Bible Camp. Then NB (aka Ivan) was asking me to massage him after one of the tough day. And ppl started to crowd. And ppl started to ask for massage as well. And I started to massage them (8 in a row). Well, after that my wrist was a little dislocated (dunno how) and I had to stop rendering my service for 1 month.

Why am I writing about this? I want to testify that God may work wonders in amazing and unthinkable ways. One night when I was massaging Mbah (Mba Endang's mum) for her backache (and she claimed she was cured) she said that 'Si Mek itu ada rohnya' (translated into: Mike has a spirit resides in him). Well, I was actually shaken a little bit then, afraid that the spirit was an unholy one (I was once possessed by Indon spirit that made me unable to pray in English). But later on I remember that everytime I massage, I will 'invoke' (dunno the exact term) the name of The Lord. by praying in my heart. So, I believe that the spirit that the animistic Mbah saw in me is The Holy Spirit, (praise God!). This was further emphasized by the claim Mbah made that I 'tirakat' (meditate, i think) every night. Well, every night I was worshipping God with Ko Hendra's (my FA leader) guitar. Mbah believed that this was the source of my 'power' and for this I'm fully in agreement with her.

That testimony from an unbeliever (I even got to share the Gospel with them after that!) made me pretty convinced that God can use me in His healing ministry through massaging. Amos (another FA member who is pretty much senior in terms of spirituality) mentioned to me about laying hand and the sick would be healed as a sign of believer. Yes, massaging involved laying of hands isnt it? Many people has suggested me to open a semi-pro massage center or something, but I wont do it (unless for fund raising as Ko Omar suggested) because I believe in this: whatever I get for free, I will share it for free.

rand()

Just some random postings... You may want to take it seriously though :)
- katanya cinta sejati ga bisa menunggu. masa sih?
- I can do everything through Him who give me strength... Tak sekalipun Kau tinggalkanku, Yesus sahabatku...
- A cheerful look brings joy to the heart
Haha... Decipher that...

No-Crush-Day

So far has been fun, haha... Woken up by dunno wad at 5.30 am on Teddy's airbed (pretty nice bed) in Project Room 6B to find Citra n Jahat (the only Bang Nico Jahat - Red) still awake... Made some noise by disturbing Citra who was disturbing Jahat. Hahaha... Anyway Cit, if u read this beware of the thing behind you.... Well, exercised my massaging skill little bit on a ticklish-brittle body hahaha... Gotta find easier target, ticklish body is as tough as uber-muscular body to be massaged u see...

Currently at The Cathay. It's free cone day (Ben n Jerry's) and so far I took 4 shots on the ice-cream haha. Was with NB just now, but he's now off for a movie. Still hanging around here waiting for Veby to finish her movie and Tirza (still questionable whether she's coming or not). FYI, both are my friends, not my crush haha, so I'm not violating my own rule... Okay, I checked her blog just now, but hey, that's like peeling the cover of a pack of bubble gum in Singapore 5 years ago (ie. not really violating the rule but can be considerd against you).

Spent already 13.50 today. Oh well, I felt like having some good food. Talked to Danny earlier about my craving for crazy food hunt. Well, I am now pretty satisfied. I was having Chilli Cheeseburger of Carl Jr. Very very ex! But yeah, it was worthed haha (the free flow drink is a nice perk). But for sure I wont have a date there. My barbaric way of eating was shown there. Wew... Must keep my image a little bit more dignified laaa (aka harus jaim!!)...

Going to study now.... (after I'm going to the washroom doing some business... this must be the 4 shots of Ben and Jerry's hahhahaaha)

Unattach the semi-attached fella

Tomorrow is my self-declared No-Crush-Day. I'm not attached yet, so must learn not to attach myself (yet) hahhahaha..... Dunno whether can survive or not haha. Well, one thing I have to write here is that this particular girl has changed my life (yes, +ve way, in case she accidentally stumbles accross this blog). For example I started attending lectures (though for not-fully-politically-correct reason haha). Anyway, enough of that haha...

On the more serious note, I am really really blessed knowing this girl (despite my feelings for her). She is a pretty new believer (double meaning intended haha). After backsliding for 1.5 yrs she is on fire for God now. Just looking at her zeal make me going back to my first love for God. Been weary those days. I withdrew from my sound system ministry due to 'tiredness'. I was honest when I told my boss that I was tired. One hour travel every Sunday at 6.45am, then packing up the whole sound system. It IS tiring.

But after I met this girl, I saw the zeal in her, then I am ashamed of myself. Come on, God has done many things in my life and I only do this little (not to repay Him, but as a show of my gratitude)... Anyway, received this SMS from her when I asked her for an Easter service "haha nvm wat church.. i wont turn down invitation to church one haha". Cant you see the desire for God's presence there? (Okay, maybe you cant, but that msg slapped me across my face). Adding to that, look at this message she sent me much earlier "do you know of anywhere near nus which sells bible? xxxxxxxxxxx" (the 'x..' is her name). She mentioned later that (I dun remember the exact quote) one day without God's Word is quite weird for her. Another slap across my cheek. I've grown accustomed to 'God' (as in the word 'God') up to a point I took everything for granted. I'm still talking to Him but really really seldom read the Bible, seldom worship Him as the way I did when I was really on fire.

That was then... Now I'm pretty much on fire to serve God (but I'm honestly still struggling to read the Bible). But dont get me wrong okay, I'm not doing my work at church to impress the afore-mentioned girl haha, we are from two different churches. Shared little bit of my services with her but my intention was not to impress her, but to motivate her so that she wont backslide again. Keeping her in my prayers for two things, one of which is so that she will grow stronger in faith everyday, up to a point she can transform her family. Another one? You know laaaaaa, dont need to ask one! Hahahahahaahahha.....

Jehovah Jireh part 2

Well, this is the lyrics of the song I mentioned in a previous post. God Will Make A Way by Don Moen.

God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me

He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way

By a roadway in the wilderness, He'll lead me
And rivers in the dessert I will see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
He will do something new today

Impulse 101

No, not that I'm gonna blog about some CS stuff... Just gonna share a little bit about my impulsiveness. I wonder why I' so impulsive when it comes to doing something. Well this blog is one of the babies of my impulsiveness. I never planned to have a blog... But then I used Aldo's laptop and happened to see Nonk's blog and with a snap of a finger (right one, that is... I couldnt snap my left fingers)... lamistry.blogspot.com. Another example is how I becomes the second-lowest-CAP among all my Indonesian friends in my batch. Coz I studied only when I had some 'kick'... Oh heck, now I'm pretty much started to force myself to study (in Ko Omar's house that is).

My impulse is my greatest driving factor. But sometimes, I just cant explain this to people. Just very recently, I was being questioned (must fill in this crazy questionnaire) about my motivation to Thailand mission trip. Well, I only have a reason: my impulse. It is like, He called, I answered, then I'm on the mission. Other people think it is not a valid reason (or at least I guess they just dont understand... yet) like Ko Wibi. He asked me to go back and try to unearth some more motivations. Well, guess I dont have any other one, Ko.... I understand the rationale behind tha exercise, but what to say... I have already been honest, haahhaha.....

Church guy?

Whee... This weekend I turned into a church guy, hahhahahahah.... Friday night, training for mission trip. Saturday, dawn prayer, youth prayer, sound training, then YRC Saturday then to Ko Omar (the youth pastor)'s house. Sunday, morning sound setup, morning service, TRC, FA, YRC Sunday, pack up sound, then to Ko Omar's house again.

Well, talking about going to Ko Omar's house... Feeling glad that I pretty much bonds well with the 4 kids (oh I'd rather say teens) I'm supposed to watch. Need to ensure they study well. Jane is very very much okay, I mean she would do her work (diligently), but she is quite sensitive one. If she cries already, I dunno wad to say. I think she just need someone to listen to her. Jess is good one. Pretty motivated if I challenge her with few enrichment questions (the dragon one is pretty good haha, thanks Ted). But she -imho- hates Ko Omar pretty much, well I dunno wad happen if she stay in my home with my dad... Sure she will screw (not that screw, Nonk...) herself everyday, hahaha. Then there is this international school student, Steph who are umh... very loud... hahaha... She is out of my responsibility, but she asked my help few times so yeah, gotta teach her few stuff about Phytagoras. The worst is the youngest guy, James. Very very immature guy for Sec 1 (at least I compared him to Toni and Praisely -the two youngest guys in my FA). Think he hates Jane soo much, some kind of sibling rivalry I guess. If I were in the authority, I would send one of them to some other place, waiting for James to gow up. Wellllll.... I dunno. At least, some distance would reduce the stress on Jane's part.

Hahaha.. My post this time ends up becoming listing about those guys... Thanks for reading by the way (I never said that in my previous posts haha)... Latest info, I love blogs coz sometimes I got nice info from them LOL.... (pun intended....)

Exam timetable

Wew... Seems like the four letter word is coming... Oh well, this sem my status is much better than last sem. Ok, here is the list of my modules n my confidence level.

MA 1506, 21 April
Well, content-wise, I'm contented. Out of 7 chapters, I'm pretty sure about my chapter 1, 4, 5, 6, 7 (thanks to someone out there, haha). Well, time to get my practice. Always not enough practice, my silly habit, haha. Oh, better remind myself to make cheat sheet... Confidence level: 50%

EG 1108, 23 April
The I-dunno-what-LingLing-talked-about subject. Hmm, seems like have to brush up on my content (umh, where to buy the brush ah?). Luckily, the second part taught by that ex-Miss India (as someone put it), is pretty much clearer. Trick: memorize all formulas. Wheeeee.... Confidence level: 33%

CS1101C, 24 April
Strings and pointers are pretty much hell. Other than that, good enuf. Who cares. Must master it. May get help from Why. He' the pro guy. Haha... Practical exam was not really successful but I'm contented. I think I'll get some programming by using pens and paper only (exam how to get compiler?)... Confidence level: 60%

TR2201, 26 April
After few considerations, should put it on a separate post. Hehehe.... Anyway... Confidence level: 50%

PC1432, 28 April
Wheeee... Hopeless already. But no, should not give up, right... During the whole sem always sleep in lecture, never do tutorial, copy (or skip) Mastering Physics, havent finished my labs. But of course I'v got to be responsible hahaha... Mugmugmug... Need to get ppl to help me here. Confidence level: 10% (only because I scored pretty well for my midterm)

Project Room 6B

Sometimes just wondering, is staying awake at night to study an efficient way to spend ur limited time? I mean, sleeping once in two days.... That way can 'create' some extra hours but so tiring... Anyway, back to work (or sleep?!)

Jehovah Jireh

"God will make a way, when there seems to be no way..."

That song has been around for pretty long time... As far as I remember, been there since I'm in Sunday School hahha... 'Jehovah Jireh' means God Provider, has been pasted on my msn nick and it is the easiest way to summarize the song mentioned above (I'll write the full lyric if I got time)...

I've experienced many things in my life that made me believe in this. Just one example, i've had stayed in a $2 mil condo for free for a month. That condo is my teacher's one and he happened (and still is) to stay in the boarding school, leaving the condo empty for the weekdays. Tha time I was looking for accomodation (and mightily under stress due to bad A level performance, ok fine RELATIVELY bad performance), to be occupied immediately. To cut short the story, a fren of mine, Dimas, helped me to talk to this teacher and thus... I got to stay there for a solid month (other than a month is not solid, it s an abstract object).

Just recently, (yesterday) I was offered a job, $15/hr, +transport +meal, as a tutor. Not really a tutor, coz wad I need to do is just to watch 3 kids studying, making sure they do their homeworks n stuff. In the mean time, I do my job. I believe, this is an answer to my stupid budget-askin' prayer. Been asking My Dad for a considerable sum of money (vacation stay + mision trip to Thailand + daily needs + Bible camp) and yeah, I believe He can make ways when I thought there is no way at all (PS: I no time la, so I thought I cant get any job haha).

Oh, and I'm still waiting for another prayer of mine to be clarified (pun intended), lol (yet another pun intended). God opened some ways already but I'm not sure whether it is His way or just my crazy impulse... Oh well, better back to study first before I think of that...

PS: If you notice me writing few extra 'I's blame that to C programing (gotta press 'I' to go to INSERT mode you see...)

It begins here...

(hope it wont stop here...) Oh well, my second attempt blogging. The first one was joint and the topic was limited. This one shouldnt be limited, i guess... Just random rambling of The Lame One (not the handicapped lame, the corny lame, that is). Well, here's the start. Hope it wont finish anytime soon. See you then (if you havent turned invisible by the time i supposedly see you)...